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Of Bitches and Bastards

Posted by Cathy Douglas on January 6, 2011 at 11:25 AM

Okay, so I'm on my own now.  There's a lot of stuff I need to learn how to do, and not just home maintenance stuff that used to fall on Dan.  I've got all this money:  insurance money, survivor benefits, retirement accounts.  The catch is, it has to last for the rest of my life.  I have to learn how to invest and budget, and use the latest techy-tools to accomplish such things.


 

And then there's work.  They had their annual owner's meeting last week, and gave me a promotion.  Same pay rate, but more hours, an affordable health insurance plan, and a title.  (I'm now an assistant manager, which is a little silly since, aside from the store owners, there's only one other regular employee.  Poor Kat--if all three of us are there at once, we'll have to take turns managing her.)

 

The store is getting new software, so we can really promote our web store.  Web business is growing, and there's plenty of room for someone to develop an online metaphysical store that doesn't just sell products, but has free information on topics of interest to our customers.  New Age is enough of a specialty that there aren't that many attractive store sites, and the ones I've seen don't excite me.  Someone who can present these subjects really well, without all the woo-woo dewey-eyed-let's-commune-with-the-unicorns nonsense that turns people off, can draw in a lot of curious people.  We can do this.


 

Needing to learn so much has sent me to the self-help section of the Kindle store.  I bought myself one of those babies last month, and received a bunch of Amazon gift cards for Christmas.  So I'm amassing a little library of useful mini-texts, most of them with numbers in the title:  4-Hour Workweek, 8 Minute Meditation, {i}Nice Girls Don't Get Rich:  75 Avoidable Mistakes Women Make with Money.  . .

 

There!  That's the other thing:  The latest thing in the self-help world is to stop being a Nice Girl and turn into a Bitch instead.  The consensus of titles is that Nice Girls don't get good jobs, can't manage their money, fail at relationships, and end up fat and depressed.  Whereas Bitches are skinny, loved by men, on a righteous budget, and generally in control of every aspect of their life.  I feel like I've stumbled into Love Yourself Or Else! Bootcamp.


 

I guess it's no longer hip to be nice.  That would explain a lot of things, wouldn't it?  I blame talk radio.  In any case, this isn't the future we were expecting.  Back in the seventies and eighties, the feminist movement sought middle ground.  The ideal was shared power:  men who'd clawed their way to the top would see the advantages of a more feminine style, and adopt strategies of cooperation and consensus building. 


 

Guess that didn't work.


 

So don't be surprised if I turn into a Bitch.  I'd rather be a Bastard, but for some reason girls can't be Bastards.  Doesn't make a lot of sense, since a bastard is literally just an illegitimate child.  You'd thing there would be as many girl ones as boy ones.  Maybe it's simply that the boys were ahead of the game in the Me First, Screw Everyone Else competition of life, and now us chicks are ready to take a shot at winning. 


 

Ready, Bitches?

 


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